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By Andy, June 18, 2009 11:38 pm

Let’s face it - all of us have challenges each day.  For some of us, we simply need support to just maintain our prayer lives.  That’s certainly true of me, as I can easily forget to talk to our Father.

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10 NIV)

I move around too much.

I can get unfocused all too easily.

I want to watch TV.

I want to read.

I want to write.

I don’t want to be still.  But He commands us to be still.

Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. (Psalm 37:7 NLT)

I really don’t want to be patient, either.

The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.  I will advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8 NLT)

If I am still, I will hear Him. And when I hear Him, I will know that He knows what’s best for me, He will guide me.

What do I need to say to Him?

What do you need to say to Him today?

How can we pray for each other today?

::

So with that, Prayer Request Fridays are back.  Leave your requests below.  Or if you’re on Facebook, you can leave your prayer requests there, too.

Comments (3)

By Andy, June 15, 2009 4:26 pm

So I’m an ADHD narcissistic stalker.

How about you?

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By Andy, June 11, 2009 11:05 pm

It’s one of those words that in my prior church experience was perhaps not taken seriously enough.  What does it really mean to be “authentic” in the Christian context?

According to Merriam-Webster to be authentic is to be “not false or imitation : real, actual“.

Until recent years, I hadn’t really understood what that meant or how to do it.

And then I read Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz. I read Mark Driscoll’s Confessions of a Reformission Rev. G.K. Chesterton’s Orthodoxy. And suddenly, I started to understand - I saw how each grappled with their faith, with Jesus, with their church, with how they perceived themselves and how they were perceived by others in the Christian community and I could relate to their issues.

However I still didn’t know how to do it myself. It was not something that I grew up learning how to do (nor, in retrospect, was that encouraged, but that would be the subject of a much lengthier post), and to be honest, I’m not sure that I knew that I needed to be able to do it in the first place.

Until…I came face-to-face with men in my local community who encouraged me to be real with them.  Perhaps encourage is the wrong word.  These men demanded it of me, and I demanded it of them.  More to the point - our faith demanded (and still demands) it.  If I am to grow in my walk in Jesus, I need to confront my own weaknesses and be held accountable by Him - and He does that through other folks.  With me, He has certainly done that in the company of the brothers I now keep.

In recent weeks I have seen many of my brothers be very real about their lives, the way I have been with them.   In each circumstance…

…we listened.

…we encouraged.

…we prayed.

It was real.

It was authentic.

It was Jesus meeting each of us at his moment of pain.

And it was very good.

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By Andy,

A few quick key takeaways so far from Dino Rizzo’s Servolution…

The goal of our servolution has always been to demonstrate the love of Jesus, not to make people feel like they now owed it to us to come to a service.Serving people is not just something we want to do; it’s something we need to do. People discover personal healing through helping others.

When we focus on caring for people, God takes care of the church.

Servolution is about expanding the kingdom, not just our church.

Every Christian needs to serve…through serving…staff, leaders and congregation have matured deeply in their spiritual walk, in their marriages, in their finances, in their relationships, in their emotions, and in their personal lives.

We don’t want to be known for our average generosity; we want to be a church that gives with extreme generosity.

Our understanding of “the poor” has to include any person in any kind of bondage or under any kind of oppression who needs the freedom of Christ shown to them.

A servolution costs those who ignite it.

Servolution reminds us that this is all about Him and not about us.

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By Andy, June 9, 2009 5:40 am

…fasting is the secret key that unlocks heaven’s door and slams shut the gates of hell.

- Jentezen Franklin, “Fasting”

I have never refrained from anything for 40 days before.

I’ve never given up anything during the 40 days of Lent.

Never.

Have I fasted?

Yes…partial fasts, having gone vegetarian for a week, or the occasional workday fast wherein I’ve chosen not to eat during the working day.  I’ve also fasted from blogging as well - typically for a week at a time, and usually as part of a church-wide week of prayer and fasting.

But this time, I sensed the need to go longer…to fast from online social media like blogging, Facebook, and Twitter.  I saw the hold that this technology held on me when I began this fast, and I didn’t like what I saw about myself.  I also found myself drifting a bit in faith, and knew that by giving up online social media I would have more time to focus on my faith and my family.

I have to admit, it was a bit of a struggle the first week not blogging, not reading Facebook, not updating my Twitter feed.  I battled the need to always be in the know, or the need to come up with some really clever tweet or status update.  I did, however, find myself reading assorted resources about social media from both sides of the divide:  from those who believe that online social media is not real community to those who believe that it is a new form of community (I’ll discuss this in a future post).  I spent more time in the Bible and in prayer, tried to be more intentional about the time spent with my wife and kids, in addition to time spent with friends locally, and reading quite a bit more than I had.

So what did I discover?

1)  I was able to hear God’s voice in my life with greater clarity.  That doesn’t mean that I heard this booming voice from above, but rather I could sense an impression on my heart, confirmed typically by others unsuspecting of the answers to prayer that I had been seeking.

2)  One of the “impressions” I got was to spend more time with Hank.  While I have been spending time with him coaching baseball, I hadn’t spent a lot of one-on-one time with him.  I purchased and read “Raising a Modern Day Knight” at the suggestion of a fellow brother, and as a result, I now spend time with him each evening reading a chapter of the Bible (we’re reading Exodus together), discussing each chapter, discipling him in faith on his journey to manhood.

3)  I have spent the better part of the past 40 days reading, re-reading, and praying through Ephesians 5:21-33.  How can I love my wife sacrificially, the way Jesus loves His church?  Too often men stop reading after verse 22 - but the fact is that there are three times as many instructions for husbands (9 verses for husbands, 3 verses for wives) than there are for wives in that passage - so who’s got more work to do in their marriages?  I know I don’t always get this right, but I know that if I am to be the husband that God has called me to, this is how I am to love my wife.  And I want my son to one day love his wife sacrificially.

4)  For several weeks I had been meeting with 2 other men in my church for accountability early on Thursday mornings.  We shared our struggles and challenges, but as we talked, we got the sense that more men needed this kind of relationship.  So what began with 3 of us has now doubled in size (and may continue to grow in number) as men from our church come together every Thursday morning at a local coffeeshop to discuss the prior week’s sermon message and challenge each other to apply those principles in our lives.  The first time that newer faces came to our group, we saw instant transparency - clearly a confirmation that more men needed to be in these kind of relationships to become the men that Jesus has called us to be.

Those are but a few of the things that occurred while I was away - more to share in coming days and weeks.  In the meantime, one final and very cool thing to share - Hank’s baseball team, the team I coach - has advanced in the playoffs.  Big game tonight - winner moves on, losing team goes home!

It’s good to be back.  Thanks for your prayers.

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By Andy, May 26, 2009 12:49 pm

Book: HERO

Author: Fred Stoeker & Jason Stoeker with contributions by Mike Yorkey

Summary:

You already know it’s not easy being a single man in this culture today. But it is easy to be overwhelmed, to feel helpless and hopeless about living by God’s high standards for singles. It’s easy to cave in to the pressures of this sex-soaked world and accept defeat—blaming the media, the culture, even girlfriends who don’t know how tough it can be.

But many men have read books like Every Young Man’s Battle and Tactics and have committed themselves to stand strong and pure in the power of God, and to go on the offensive against the onslaught of negative stereotypes. Some have suffered. Some have fallen. But many have experienced victory—and you can be among them.

What makes those committed men so desirable to women? Be Her Hero is their motto. From best-selling author Fred Stoeker, along with his son Jasen, come the straightforward insight and real-life examples you’re looking for to help you take personal purity to its logical conclusion. Here’s straight truth with irrefutable evidence of what makes an ultimate hero to women who long for men of faith—men who stand by their convictions and make their world a safer and better place.

Are you ready to accept the challenge?

Author Bios:

Fred Stoeker is a best-selling author of several books, including Every Young Man’s Battle and Tactics, the president of Living True Ministries, and a popular conference speaker who challenges men to become sexually pure, to reconnect in true intimate relationship with their wives, and to train their sons to become godly men. A graduate of Stanford University, Fred lives in Des Moines, Iowa with his wife, Brenda, and their children.

Mike Yorkey, a writer living in Encinitas, California, has collaborated with Fred Stoeker in all his books for the Every Man’s series.

Jasen Stoeker is a popular conference speaker who challenges young men to be heroic in their relationships with women and to be a Christian, rather than just seem like one. Jasen is a graduate of Iowa State University with degrees in Computer Engineering and Computer Science and now lives in Minneapolis, MN, with his wife Rose.

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By Andy, April 29, 2009 10:24 pm

Online social media has really taken off this past year. With the rise of Facebook and now Twitter, we are now more connected to each other than ever before. I’m not suggesting that it’s a bad thing, mind you, but for me, I’m reaching a point where I am facing my own narcissism, and I’m not sure that I like what I see.

Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked, I enjoy being liked, I have to be liked, but it’s not like this compulsive need to be liked. Like my need to be praised.

- Michael Scott, “The Office”

I carry a Blackberry. For work. But it’s all too easy to have the mobile Opera browser and check in on Facebook Mobile. Or use Twitterberry to update my Twitter status (which automatically updates my Facebook status, too). The tool, in and of itself, is fine. But I’m becoming addicted to the “2 people like this” thumbs up on some comment, and the various amusing comments that others might write in response.

This was an offshoot of blogging for me. I started blogging here at The Beach over 3 years ago, random musings on life and faith. I wrote a lot in the earlier days, and enjoyed the various comments from readers, many of whom stumbled upon the musings of this husband and father living a mile from the Pacific Ocean. I couldn’t help but be excited when a particular post elicited a wide variety of comments, and seeing the comment counter tick upward was a rush. The discussions, too, were enjoyable to read, with some even sparking interesting debate.

Yet over the course of the past couple of years, the frequency with which I’ve been writing has slowed, and I have reached a point where I’m usually okay if no one comments. The main thing is that the blog has been an outlet to write, and if anyone actually responds to what I’ve written, that’s a bonus.

Note the word “usually”.

I would not be honest if I didn’t say that sometimes I wished there were more interaction on some posts. But that’s a function of my ego… “What, this post was awesome! Why didn’t y’all comment?” (And stroke my ego, right?)

Fast forward to the rise of Twitter and Facebook.

Now you don’t need to write anything substantial to elicit a response. A snarky comment, a random 140 character musing about what I’m doing, or even some quote (whether thought provoking or amusing), is much more likely to generate a comment. Photos uploaded, tagged to include friends in the photo, will certainly generate comments. That interactivity is fun, especially when it is with old high school and college friends (in a couple of cases, old teachers), and even with local friends.  Social media, in and of itself, is a useful connectivity tool.  After all, we humans were created to live relationally, and this is an easy way to do it.

But because we are in community (online) with X number of friends, now we come to expect those comments, and I think our egos get slightly bruised when no one comments on a tagged photo…or there’s a delay in a response. We want to be recognized for the things we share on Facebook or Twitter, don’t we? For instance, I was sending field trip photos of my son and his class to Twitter and to Facebook…while ON the field trip – all in the name of “sharing” - when I should have been enjoying the moment WITH the kids after taking the photos (and not worry about a real-time update to Facebook).

It’s all about me, isn’t it? Me and the collective “me”.  We’ve each become “stars” in online worlds of our making.  We like the feedback that comes from the comments.

The reality is that I’m finding myself online too much looking at other’s status updates and the relevant comments. I’m hunting for the “thumbs up” or the comments on a 140 character status update. I seek the comments on my blog.

Maybe it’s time for me to unplug for awhile and live “offline”.

Therefore…the Beach will go dark for the next 40 days as part of a fast from online social media (although I admit that I will break the fast for one day in mid-May for a book review as part of a blog tour that I previously committed to.)   I will not be active on Facebook nor Twitter during this time.  Aside from the one post mentioned, I will not be writing nor commenting, although since some of your blogs are in my Google Reader, I may read a post here or there.

You might think I’m taking this to an extreme.  Well…maybe…after all, I dove in headfirst into Facebook a couple of months ago, using the medium, connecting with friends past and present, sharing thoughts and ideas in 140 characters or less.  For me, this 40 day fast will allow me the chance to slow down, hopefully connect some of you by voice or even face to face.

It’s interesting that the current message series at my church is focused on the idea of having “One Month to Live”.  How would I live my life differently - today - if I knew that I had one month to live?  What changes in relationships would I make if I had one month to live?  What about myself would I want changed so that I could leave this world with a clean slate?  Somehow I don’t think spending an extra hour a day on social media would be what I would choose.

So…it begins today.  I will make one last round on Facebook tonight, one last round on Twitter, and sign off until June 10.

See you in forty days.

::

Note: I can still be reached via email and phone…I’m not going completely dark.

Comments (2)

By Andy, April 27, 2009 11:11 pm

It was a short call, as far as phone calls go.

The message was quick.

The point was received even more quickly.

A once tough veteran of the Second World War, a Navy man, a family man, a follower of Jesus, passed away this morning.

I hung up the phone and let my kids know as we drove onto school today, the music of Delirious? forming the soundtrack to the narration that we each listened to in our heads.  After I had pulled into a parking space outside the school, I turned off the engines and asked each of the kids who wanted to start our morning prayer for the day.

Both declined.

So I started it…in silence…attempting to gather the words for what was going to be a difficult morning prayer.  My voice cracked as I fumbled through the requests for protection and wisdom in our days, but the tears began to flow only when I thanked Jesus for the life now passed into eternity, his frail body, which required a walker for mobility, now healed, dancing once again in the streets, reunited with family and with the One Who Saved Us.

I turned to look at the kids, each crying openly, wiping their tears with the sleeves of their sweatshirts.  They understood the finality of the life we will miss, but each knew that this man, who they had greeted every Sunday with hugs, was now experiencing a joy that we hope to one day have.

I thought back a couple of years to the time when I had visited them on my own after he and his wife had had a sustained absence from our fellowship.  Our church family was in discussions to merge with another church family, and I wanted to give each of them the information about the proposed merger.  His words will never leave me.

“If this is what Jesus wants, then it’s what I want.”

May my faith (and yours) be that simple.

Wayne, I’m glad to have known you on this side of eternity.  Until we meet again.

Comments (2)

By Andy, April 26, 2009 11:01 pm

Love is an unconditional commitment to the absolute best for another person.

- Jonathan Markham

So, how have you loved unconditionally? How have you made an unconditional commitment to the absolute best for another? Or are there strings?

Or let me put it another way. Is it possible to have this kind of love this side of eternity?

I know I haven’t loved like this. But it is something I am striving for, starting with my wife and kids.

Anyone else?

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By Andy, April 21, 2009 9:10 pm

If you’ve been around this blog for any length of time, or know the stuff I’ve been reading this past year, you guys know I’ve enjoyed the stuff written by Mark Batterson.  And now the small group study based on his book Wild Goose Chase is coming out next month.  Here’s the teaser!

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGGwc3ndLTg]